Acie Ford, A Man of the Cloth
Part Three of Three Interviews.
Today is March 6. My name is Jim Green and I again am speaking with Acie Ford. We are continuing our conversation about his life and testimony.
We ended our last interview, Acie, praising God for his sudden and wonderful healing of your wife's blindness. That must have been an experience unlike anything else in your life.
ACIE: The miracle of Marolyn's healing was one of God's "suddenlies" in my life. It was so sudden that I felt I had no part in it. It was so much of God I felt I was off somewhere looking at what God was doing.
I confess that I feared Marolyn's eyesight would leave her as quickly as it came. I thought about that for days, weeks and months. I would always ask her, "Marolyn, can you still see?".
JG: And yet, you eventually realized it was real and God had perfomed the impossible right in front of your eyes?
ACIE: It was a defining moment in our lives. Nothing would ever be the same again.
JG: Amen. Well, I would like to regress slightly. I want to talk about your marriage, Acie. Start from the beginning and give us some insight about your life with Marolyn, your plans for the future and maybe something about yourselves we don't already know. Can you do that?
ACIE: The first thing I think about is the time we started dating. Do you know we couldn't even hold hands in public? Our school wouldn't permit a public display of affection. It was a very strict school - along the line of Bob Jones University.
The first time I ever kissed Marolyn was at a theme park where we went on a ride in a little boat underneath the cover. I kissed her in the dark where no one could see us. Boy, that was a real no-no where I went to school!
JG: I can't believe you started off with something that may get us both in trouble. Marolyn may get you, then come after me for revealing that!
ACIE: That's pretty much the extent of our physical relationship before marriage. We got to know each other in our minds first. Our minds grew together and our spirits grew together and only God could do that. "What God hath joined together, let no man put asunder." We would talk and talk about everything till there was nothing else to say. On August 14, 1962, we became one.
I struggled through our early relationship a little because I had the mercy gift. I would ask myself, "Am I going to be committed to her?" I found myself looking at Marolyn's blindness and could see myself taking care of her for the rest of my life. Then I looked at my own shortcomings and realized that each of us has handicaps. Sure, blindness is severe, but it's possible for a person to have perfect 20/20 vision and be spiritually blind. That's far worse than someone with physical blindness.
JG: I can see you both taking long walks together. I can imagine her arm always interlocked in your own.
ACIE: Yeah. Most of the time I carried her heavy tape recorder for her. She used it for recording her school lessons. It was an old Wollensak unit and it was real heavy but I still enjoyed the walk. We would just walk and talk.
JG: I know from Marolyn's book, These Blind Eyes Now See, that she would try to appear "normal". In fact, an average person meeting Marolyn the first time might not know she was blind by the way she acted.
ACIE: That's right. Marolyn pretended she wasn't blind. When someone would drop something, she'd look in the direction of the noise. She would even appear to give eye contact to a person speaking to her.
JG: But she obviously needed your assistance at times?
ACIE: Sure. I would help clean the house and make up the bed - things like that.
JG: In her testimony, Marolyn has said she would memorize the location of things around the house in order to seem to make those who visited your home feel more comfortable.
ACIE: That's right. The second house in which we lived in Grand Rapids was a one room apartment in a widow's house. I remember that the kitchen was so small it seemed like a closet. But the two years there were happy. Marolyn and I'd go to church with that widow lady and she would ask me to drive her car. She had recently lost her husband and her son had a chronic illness. I think we ministered to each other in those days.
Marolyn would ask me to describe things for her. I wanted to describe it fully, so I would spend as much time as she wanted. I painted verbal pictures for her as best I could. She's since told me that doing that drew me closer to her.
JG: As Marolyn began to lose what little sight she had, what were you thinking?
ACIE: When I first met Marolyn, she hadn't been able to see for 6 to 8 months. Marolyn told me that she could have surgery but her chances of seeing again were only 50/50. Then there was the very real possibility that the surgery itself could cause permanent loss of vision. She didn't have peace about it because she could see outlines and shadows as it was. The thought of total loss was almost too much to bear. As time went on and her sight diminished, she learned to cope. She's never wanted pity or sympathy.
JG: Did you ever fear that you might not be able to give her what she needed? What if you lost your vision - your ability?
ACIE: Strange you should say that. I went through that. Marloyn's life verse says, "Go and tell what great things the Lord has done for you".(1) For 75 to 80 days a year for 20 years, she would travel, meeting pastors and giving her testimony to over 2000 churches. Add to that radio, television and newspaper, and you know I was alone at home a lot. I confess, the more she shared her testimony, I felt pressure building inside of me. I would miss her deeply. I guess you could call it selfishness. One day I shared my feelings with Marolyn before she left to go out of town. Later that night I had an overwhelming sense that I could lose my own sight if I didn't let go. It's hard to describe, but I knew I had to get rid of those feelings regardless of my loneliness. It wasn't a dream - God just impressed me.
As soon as she returned home, I told her, "I want you know, anytime you want to go somewhere and share your testimony - I want you to do that. If I was blind and God healed me, I would want to tell the world, too. Forgive me for what I said."
JG: That had to be hard for you. We men are proud and, as far as pastors go, it must be tough to have a wife with what seems to be a "larger" testimony than your own. But then, God equipped this pastor with mercy, didn't he?
ACIE: I gave Marolyn to God and I've always said that Marolyn walks with God more than she walks with me. When we stand before the Lord, it's not going to be Acie and Marolyn, it's going to be Acie. I have to give an account of myself.
JG: I get the feeling that God selected you for Marloyn. She needed your eyes, your arms when you walked together, your protection, compassion and love. She was somewhat helpless when you knew her and would become more so. I see God as having trusted you with a tremendous responsibility.
ACIE: I feel like I am taking care of God's choice servant. And it's a joy to do it. There's no pressure. I felt that way then and I feel that way now. Then again, Marolyn has more strength and courage than I do. We hold hands, pray together and cry together. We do a lot of that these days. I can't imagine what it's like to lose your sight; then what she copes with today - not eating, drinking or swallowing. What else does a person have beyond sight, eating and drinking. And if Satan takes it all away, it is still God that allows him to do it.
JG: In what way are you praying for Marolyn today, Acie? Do you pray for another "great" miracle in her life?
ACIE: (After a long pause) I do pray for miracles, but I feel even more that God told me she would be broken - that I would spend my life taking care of her and that He will be glorified more than when He opened her blind eyes. His word came to me immediately at the time of the fall. I had no idea what God meant by "broken". It would be only after her surgery a few weeks later that I would begin to understand what it meant. And it wasn't just Marolyn. Sharon, our daughter would also be broken. She lost a husband, then a baby.
There's not a night that goes by that I don't think I might lose Marolyn. It's like a nightmare when that feeding machine pumps fluids into her body to sustain her. All night long, it's like someone else in the room. And her throat and mouth is always dry - her salivary glands don't work.
She might have a cookie attack at night. Like a child, she's off to the kitchen looking for a cookie. It's just the sensation, the smell of sweetness. Now, if she chews it, she'll spit it out because she can't swallow. But she still has desire and the nights are long. She was up all night last night with a deep cutting pain in her bones. Her bones are getting brittle and susceptible to breaking. And then there is the pain of the catheter with the possible injury and infection. I often cry out and ask God, "Why?".
We often wonder what will mark the end? I think of that old song, "Till the Storm Passes By". It's then that God's grace comes to me and encourages me to be faithful to the end. We just have to trust Him and hang in there. I think God has shown me that I get weighed down when I look at the particulars of our situation. When I look at our troubles, it looks really dark. But if I take one step at a time - one day at a time - I see God's provision as I go.
His Word says, "My word is a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path".(2) God gives us a little light each day. Like right now. I don't know what we are facing. This is a very difficult time. Marloyn's bladder is being catheterized over and over - "in" feeds her and "out" empties her. She literally lives on tubes. She is more of another world than this one.
When, Lord? Why? I asked the same thing when she was blind. You wouldn't believe the similarities. She has such an attitude of strength through her weakness. She once pretended she wasn't blind while today she pretends she can live without water. She sees nothing as impossible because there is nothing impossible to her Lord. I can't see her because all I see is God. We know that Christ is being formed in us as Christians. I'm able to see it happen before my eyes through Marloyn's life. She's eliminated anything that would keep Him from not being formed. That's where I see her. I know it sounds like I'm bragging on her, but I'm not...
JG: I know that, Acie. May I tell you what Jim Cymbala, pastor of Brooklyn Tabernacle Church, said in his book, Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire? "God is attracted to weakness. He can't resist those who humbly and honestly admit how desperately they need him".(3) The scripture says, "God's strength is made perfect in our weakness".(4) The admission of your own weakness releases God to make Himself known through you. Am I right?
Acie: Amen. I believe that. "I glory in my infirmities in order that the power of Christ might be displayed in me".(4) I am her caregiver, her husband, her mate and her friend; but God is our strength. We've never found God's grace to be more sufficient than right now.
JG: And that's the theme of Marolyn's new book isn't it? Her first was These Blind Eyes Now See. It gave testimony of God's miraculous healing power. Her second book was called, Walking and Talking with Jesus with a subtitle reading, "Building Faith Before Tragedy." That's almost prophetical because the new work, Grace to Endure tells the story of God's amazing grace through tragedy.
ACIE: I thank God for that book. You know, she started writing it at the lowest moment of her condition. The doctors don't know much about her physical condition. I've spent hours researching it on the Internet just to find out that no one else knows about it either. Her book goes into detail about her illness. Since no one really understands her illness, this book makes a way for others to know more about it and benefit from her experience.
JG: I see another benefit. For over a year now, Marolyn has worked night and day putting her thoughts in writing. It was as if the project energized her. I guess that gives me concern that she may have a low point after the release of the book. I am hoping that she will find a way to continue her ministry even through her confining circumstances.
As we've discussed in the past, e-mail communication with those who read her books might keep her energy level up while touching many who have not heard her testimony.
Thank you, Acie, for spending time with me. I am confident that everyone reading this will see God's grace, not Acie or Marolyn Ford. Finally Acie, can you tell us how to pray for you.
ACIE: Right now, Marolyn is really suffering a lot. Pray for comfort, that she will have the right doctors. This last Thursday she had a test that revealed what we feared. She is now showing long-term distress by virtue of her nutritional feeding. Her bones are weak and she is in almost constant pain. We don't know where to go from here. I know I would do it all over again. I believe there is no greater joy than knowing you are in the middle of God's plan for your life.
JG: "When you're up against a struggle that shatters all your dreams and your hopes have been cruelly crushed by Satan's manifested schemes. When you feel the urge within you to submit to earthly fear, don't let the faith you standing in seem to disappear. Praise the Lord. He can work through those who praise him, praise the Lord. For our God inhabits praise. Praise the Lord. For the chains that seem to bind you serve only to remind you that they drop powerless behind you when you praise Him." (5)
ACIE: Praise the Lord.
Visit Marolyn's WebPage: http://www.marolynford.com/.
(1) Luke 8:39
(2) Psalm 119:105
(3) Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire, by Jim Cymbala; (c) Zondervan Publishing House, 1997
(4) 2 Corinthians 12:8-10
(5) Praise the Lord; Words/Music by Brown Banister/Mike Hudson.
